Elegant letter: a cease and desist from Aziraphale

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Jul 27, 2008
19,425
3,400
Stirlingshire, Scotland
#1
On the one hand, this thread. But on the other hand I just discovered the
@Sotherans
Twitter feed. So either way I win.
Quote Tweet


Henry Sotheran Ltd


did our bookshop just get delivered a cease and desist from aziraphale

@neilhimself and @terryandrob the fandom is out of control, which I have no complaints about but good heavens
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https://twitter.com/i/user/313251018
 
Last edited:

RathDarkblade

Moderator
City Watch
Mar 24, 2015
15,992
3,400
47
Melbourne, Victoria
#2
Sigh. I can't read a word that says! :( All the "curly bits" are all very fancy, I'm sure, but they make it much harder to read (and I'm wearing glasses).

Can anyone please transcribe, if possible?
 

=Tamar

Lieutenant
May 20, 2012
11,961
2,900
#3
NB the paper is watermarked
A.Z.FELL AND CO.
BOOKSELLERS
[letterhead:]
A.Z.FELL AND CO.
BOOKSELLERS
GREEK STREET SOHO LONDON

18th December 2020

My dear Oliver,

I hope you'll forgive the familiarity when we haven't been properly introduced! I've been following your Twittering for a little while and have been delighted by your adventures in bookselling and navigation of the social medium. I trust this missive finds you well and that the present unhappy situation of the world isn't weighing too heavily upon you.

I should say, to begin with, that this is not in any way your fault. Rather, a combination of circumstances: your highly engaging accounts of life at Sotheran's and my - upon reflection, inadvisable - decision to place the word 'Booksellers' quite so prominently outside my own place of work, have led to a troubling increase in potential customers.

For some inexplicable reason, certain people have latched onto

-page two-

the idea that you and I are one and the same, conflating your excellent premises with my own, and consequently are under the impression that I am eager to attract codex-starved bibliophiles from far and wide. I suppose it's too much to ask that people understand the nuance of the title of bookseller, especially when it comes to books of a rare or antiquarian nature.

While I am undoubtedly a bookseller, it does not immediately follow that I'm eager to sell books. At least when someone attempts to adopt a pet or a child, there are stringent checks upon the prospective home. But I digress. I wonder if I might prevail upon you to dispel any misperception amongst your followers that we are the same being. Even a very brief on-the-line statement would help.

I would be tremendously grateful and will gladly direct any custom that strays through my doors your way, should you so desire.

Sincerely and with warmest wishes,
Aziraphale

P.S. Crowley respectfully declines to apologise for Pompei or Herculaneum.
 
Last edited:

=Tamar

Lieutenant
May 20, 2012
11,961
2,900
#4
Please accept my apology for the need to edit, but I had typoed an American spelling into the letter.

By the way, the sealing wax is silver and blue in a somewhat tartan-like pattern. The seal is the two runes that are used to transliterate A and Z. The calling card (I really shouldn't call it a business card) is engraved (you can tell because the ink is above the paper, not stamped in as it would be if it were printed), and although it mentions "telephonic enquiries welcome", it does not give the number.
A commenter mentioned that "Pompei" is correctly spelled.
 

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